(friday five) Cultivate calm, praise yourself and stop chasing the work/life balance: Rules for life from a Happiness Consultant

The Friday Five is five minutes of workable wisdom from our favourite mind, body and spirit experts to help ease you into the weekend with a bit of love and light.

This week Happiness Consultant and Change-Maker Samantha Clarke - aka the women with the best job title on the planet - gives us a mini guide to improving life (and a bit of tough love).

Samantha Clarke is a Happiness Consultant and Change-Maker advising companies and individuals on the small things they can do to make big differences in all areas of their lives. And she's awesome. pic: samanthaand.co

Samantha Clarke is a Happiness Consultant and Change-Maker advising companies and individuals on the small things they can do to make big differences in all areas of their lives. And she's awesome.

pic: samanthaand.co

HOW TO BE HAPPY by SAMANTHA CLARKE

1. Be Proactive Not Reactive

Know your ‘why’ and be authentic in who you are. It’s important to ask yourself some tough questions on the four quadrants of your life: yourself, your home, your relationship with others and your work. 

Be the driver in your journey of life to restore harmony in ways which sit right for you. Identify any areas where you are feeling shortchanged. What conversations do you need to have to enable you to ease the tension in yourself and relationships with others? Avoid chaotic decisions. Say to no to things that don't sit well.  

Innovate don’t stagnate: look for opportunities to learn from others new ways of doing things. Seek out people you can approach for support so that you can evolve your own attitude of innovation and change.

Basically don’t be one of those people who is more interested in complaining about things than finding a solution.

Toni cultivating some inner calm c/o her wardrobe pic: Instagram/Ms_ToniJones

Toni cultivating some inner calm c/o her wardrobe

pic: Instagram/Ms_ToniJones

2. CULTIVATE CALM

Where do you turn to in order to find your version of calm? It's important to develop a relationship with our inner selves so that we know how to effectively deal with life's inevitable highs and challenges.

We must spend time to assess our triggers and sources of anxiety and find our own medicine.

And remember, whether it be connecting with nature, reminiscing over calming memories, yoga or meditation, calmness is a personal journey. All too often we can berate ourselves for not progressing quickly enough or following what's right for others in our attempts to cultivate calm. 

 

3. REDEFINE FULFILMENT (understand that less is sometimes more)

With the pressure all around us to do ‘more’ (more exercising/eating healthily/travelling/ achieving #goals etc), it’s easy to stretch ourselves too thin and end up feeling overwhelmed and empty. The first step to fulfilment is to do an audit of what is and isn’t working and why: challenge your status quo if something isn’t right, look at how things are currently done and identify where you can experiment to make things to get to where you want.

Also it’s important to make a note of your successes.

And it's important to shift away from the idea that one can achieve work/life balance. As David Whyte argues 'We must shift away from 'trading and bartering parts of ourselves as if they were saleable commodities. Work and life are not separate things, they can’t be balanced against one another; instead, they are best treated as a "movable conversational frontier.” 


DETAILS

We spoke to Samantha as part of her work with innocent coconut water where she gave tips on staying ‘Always Chilled’, reflecting the brand's process of keeping the product chilled from source to supermarket meaning there is no need for additives or preservatives.

@samanthaand_

@innocent